David Reviews

 Biting the hand that feeds us since 2002.

Vitality
"Race"
30s
5 January 2017
UK Health Insurance

Did you know you're officially an everyday athlete if you can run to your front door? We think it should only apply if the front door is inconveniently situated at the far end of the east wing or you're halfway up a mountain. All the same, Jessica Ennis duly times the woman rushing to receive her Ocado order, which comes with a discount on healthy foods.

Vitality - "Race"
Army Recruitment
"Jungle"

Mark said:

The horrors of war


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Latest Additions

Nike
"Believe In More"
2 mins
13 Jan 2017
This short film for Nike was conceived, created, and directed by avant-garde creative powerhouse and musician FKA Twigs. The grungy-beautiful two minute spot advertises Nike's new Spring Zonal Strength Tights, which are shown off to great effect by athletic dance moves from the likes of Olympic fencer Miles Chamley-Watson and krump dancer Saskia Horton.

Chessington World Of Adventures
"The Gruffalo"
30s
13 Jan 2017
This ad for Chessington World of Adventures introduces their Gruffalo River Ride Adventure - an essential experience for anyone into knobbly knees, turned-out toes, or poisonous warts on the end of their nose. There are even Gruffalo-themed rooms for kids who might enjoy sleeping under the watchful, yellow-eyed gaze of a monster.

Kuri
"Robot"
30s
13 Jan 2017
This spot introduces Kuri - a robot home assistant which promises to be 'one of the family' - and assures us that the little guy isn't going to rise up and take over humanity. Yet the way the little guy watches classic killer robot movies of its own accord is unnerving to say the least... though if nothing else, at least our new overlord will be cute.

Oak Furnitureland
"Sale"
20s
13 Jan 2017
No sign of Oak Furnitureland’s familiar duo in this standard sales ad - and the old adage that absence makes the heart grow fonder doesn’t apply here. Anyway, the retailer claims this is our last chance to procure discounted sofas, dining room sets, and the like so get your asses down pronto. Well, last chance until the next sale, that is.

Santander
"Clips"
60s
13 Jan 2017
This ad for Santander shows a montage of funny clips pulled from the internet, while a VO explains ways in which the bank is here to help its customers prosper. These kind of content-mined ads can feel like a cop-out, but the inclusion of clips that feature the brand's spokespeople is a subtle way to link this to the rest of their campaign.

Warner Hotels
"Croquet"
30s
13 Jan 2017
The adults in this ad are extremely pleased to be among their own kind - no pesky kids trying to express any irritating joy in the vicinity of their very serious croquet game. This ad gets the USP of the hotel chain across well enough... but the guests come across as worryingly smug about their intolerance for children.

Sky Broadband
"Bat-Fans"
40s
13 Jan 2017
Sky Broadband insist they’ll visit nearly any household to provide technical support. Alas, the message doesn’t penetrate Lego Batman’s cowl. Meanwhile, The Dark Knight (voiced by Will Arnett) reveals his latest innovation: the Bat-Merch Gun. Not sure how much use that’ll be fighting criminals, but it ensures maximum coverage. Lovely nods to Batmobiles old and new in the background, too.

Honda Civic
"Made Mean"
30s
13 Jan 2017
This US Honda ad takes us beneath the spick and span factory floor to meet one mean-looking assembly line. Despite appearing like they could burst into a refrain of “Crush! Kill! Destroy!” at any moment, these bots are only concerned with constructing the new Civic model. A well-animated shift from the car brand’s usual output.

Sky Broadband
"Lonely Bat"
40s
12 Jan 2017
Lego Batman's great wifi doesn't change the fact he spends his time in a damp cave and nobody wants to play with him. Unfortunately for the Sky Broadband tech team, this means he gets 'batbored' and rings them up for a chat frequently - even breaking his router on purpose for something to talk about. Maybe time for some batcounselling, Bruce.

Monster
"Research"
60s
13 Jan 2017
This ad for recruitment company Monster is dry as a bone and all the funnier for it. A woman has her CV scrutinised before she's introduced to the company's philosophy: Always Be Working ("like unlimited vacation... only the exact opposite"). Turns out even the boss's son isn't immune to the tyranny of 'abwah' - so choose your interviews carefully.

Weight Watchers
"Say Yes"
30s
13 Jan 2017
This perky Weight Watchers ad encourages us to get the old heart rate going, whether it’s outdoors or in the living room. That should help keep the January diet plan on track for a little longer. Intriguingly, the brand has also reduced something else: the amount of poundage it reckons to help us lose. The previously ad claimed it was eight times more than we might lose on our own; now it's down to seven.

Boots No 7
"The Power of Make-Up"
3 mins 35s
13 Jan 2017
The fourth installment of the Boots No 7 roundtable sees the panel discuss make-up’s transformative qualities. The decision whether to wear it or not can change our interactions in all sorts of ways. Whether it’s in the workplace or in a social context, the familiar faces discuss how cosmetics can strengthen - or conversely undermine - their position.

Nationwide
"Solemates"
20s
12 Jan 2017
It's the little things that matter when sharing a home, according to Laurie Bolger. Living with someone else can take you by surprise early on... especially if you're used to just one pair of shoes in the hallway. Now she wouldn't have it any other way. It's a sweet observation as Nationwide encourages us to think about joint current accounts.

Nationwide
"Home"
60s
11 Jan 2017
Poet Laurie Bolger talks about moving on in this latest Nationwide ad. She describes the freedom she has when her flatmates are out for the day, allowing her to "dance by the sink with that dodgy playlist" and not worry about the loo roll situation. The building society promises to help more first-time buyers turn such small pleasures into a reality.

Bensons For Beds
"Best"
30s
12 Jan 2017
To illustrate a claim that we're at our best after "a great night's sleep", we see a number of jolly people clambering up a hill for a few seconds before the ad switches attention to a number of special offers. The background music is annoying to the point of being intolerable and - as a whole - this ad undermines some of the achievements of last year's brand-building exercise.

SOHN
"Hard Liquor"
4 mins 04s
9 Jan 2017
With 'Hard Liquor' SOHN adds Moby-style blues to his usual cocktail of plangency and tricksy electronics. Jovan Todorovic's accompanying promo amplifies the mood, centring around a man stumbling through a monochrome setting in which a car lurks predatorily in the shadows. His drink-dazed intensity is impressively compelling.

Reporters Without Borders
"When I Grow Up"
40s
10 Jan 2017
Journalism is, by its nature, an unpredictable career. And for those who report from the front line, it's extremely dangerous too. This fundraising spot for Reporters Without Borders makes us wonder what qualities children like these must have to want to pursue this line of work even when they know what fate might await them.

Tate
"Gallery Tour"
3 mins 08s
10 Jan 2017
This short from BlinkInk's Jack Sachs feels like viewing an exhibition within an exhibition. His strange and wonderful animations take us on a tour of Tate Britain, and in doing so we see classic artwork with fresh eyes. The CG characters interact with sculptures, paintings and installations in a benevolently irreverent way... showcasing his own talents as well as the establishment's.

Tesco
"Curry"
30s
9 Jan 2017
Well, Tesco, I hope you're proud of yourselves. There's David - valiantly keeping his antipathy towards spicy food under wraps for the fifteen years he and Maria have been together - and you've come along and blown his cover. Even though he's specifically asked you not to. Hey ho. What's poor Maria going to do now she knows she's married to a gustatory lightweight?

Mini
"Get In"
60s
11 Jan 2017
Are you in or out? That's the pressing issue in this ad for Mini, showcasing five different models aimed at young, outdoorsy people who embrace adventure like the rest of us would embrace a hot water bottle on a cold night. If you like rock climbing, surfing, ping pong (yes), and being uber-fashionable while you do it all, this is the car for you.

Aldi
"Deer"
20s
11 Jan 2017
Puns are the order of the day for these shorts for Aldi. There's an unashamed quip involving the phrase 'too dear' in this execution, which makes us groan out loud at the end even though we've braced ourselves for the punchline from the off. But secretly we have a soft spot for the occasional dad-style one-liner, and this one gets away with its own naffness.

PETA
"Sylvie Guillem"
90s
12 Jan 2017
Former ballerina Sylvie Guillem became a vegan a few years ago, and then got involved with PETA. She is still a staunch member, and in this spot tells people her reasons for making this her dietary style of choice. While she knows she won't change the world, she hopes that she can help create a groundswell of like-minded people inspired by her example.

Alpecin
"Liquid Engineering"
20s
11 Jan 2017
This ad for Alpecin Caffeine Shampoo is a strange thing indeed. For some reason, it's modelled on an classic engine oil ad from the '80s, Castrol GTX - fun for those in the know, completely lost on those who aren't. And what exactly does caffeine to to hair, anyway?

Omaze
"Idris: Valentine's Date"
1 min 59s
12 Jan 2017
Notoriously suave actor Idris Elba - apparently having escaped the strange white dystopia Sky Q trapped him in - uses his powers for good and sends Facebook into a frenzy with this viral charity ad. The star is auctioning off a Valentine's Day date for W.E. Can Lead - an African charity which focuses on the empowerment and education of girls.

David Bowie
"No Plan"
4 mins 01s
12 Jan 2017
Historians will likely pinpoint David Bowie’s death as the moment we should’ve realised 2016 was a write-off. Still, we made it to 2017 somehow, and the music keeps coming. The title track from Bowie’s posthumous ‘No Plan’ EP receives a suitably elegaic promo from Tom Hingston.


David Reviews - Lovely Lenzie Ltd, Woodbourne House, Seven Sisters, Lenzie, G66 3AW. Telephone: +44 141 776 7766. Editor: Jason Stone.